We were exhausted. It was not the kind of fatigue or tiredness that one feels after a long run or a full day of physical labor (working in the yard?) but that satisfied feeling that we experience after the release of all the sexual and emotional energy over the course of a few hours connected with the one you love. Paul and I laid there in the moment, talking about how wonderful each other is. My body was almost sore from the delicious touching, tasting, licking, caressing, nibbling that Paul gave to me. My pussy was fatigued (not sore or raw that it can sometimes feel) but that sensation that we have that is an external indication that I needed a few hours before I could imagine him entering me again.
We are at a point in our lives where we no longer hold back from what we talk about. On this particular night, Paul asked me about sensual fantasies that might be lingering that I am holding back from discussing with him (there are, but we aren’t going to talk about them on our blog, just yet). I mentioned a few but then we found ourselves talking about his fantasy that led to us thinking about having a blog. His fantasy was one that was born from his near-revulsion that he had surrounding his semen. Aside from the loss of interest in sex that men experience (especially with younger men), Paul avoided his semen after he released whether it was inside of me, on me or in my mouth. He wouldn’t dream of kissing me after his cock had been in my mouth even if I didn’t suck him to orgasm.
Now that this cum-resistance has long passed, we seem to have taken for granted that he is always eager to put his mouth where his gorgeous cock has been; cum or no cum. It is pure joy for us both as it always leads to more orgasms for both of us.
Getting back to the discussion of fantasies, Paul loves being directed – or, should I say, “ordered?” He loves it when I tell him that he better get down to my pussy and clean his mess. He loves being told to share his cum with me. He loves it all! Paul mentioned how he still has an initial (perhaps, instinctual), visceral response when he pulls his cum-covered cock from inside of me and he sees his semen covering my labia, clit and then is begins to flow from inside of me. He hesitates and I can tell that he is momentarily (internally) addressing his avoidance instinct and is conflicted by how he loves tasting his cum on me. This is when I know that he desires my verbal intervention. It is nothing short (pun very much intended) of amazing when his cock springs to attention in mere seconds after I tell him, “Baby, you better get down there and clean up your mess!” I tell him. “I want to taste us, too! Go get it and bring it to me!”
Seconds after telling him to go down on me, I am in heaven feeling his tongue entering me and licking my vulva. The sounds of his moaning and the wetness only makes it even more enjoyable. In the midst of it all, because I am still so sensitive from having him fucking me, I find myself overrun with a succession of orgasms and demanding that his cock be inside of me yet again!
I love making my husband’s fantasies a reality. I love to give to him. In giving to him what he wants, I too receive the blessings of a love and loving relationship that is beyond fulfilling. This man truly loves me and I love and adore him.
Warning: This post contains graphic content (including imagery) and should not be viewed unless you are 18 years of age or older. Though the content is interspersed with both clinical and more conventional (i.e. bedroom) terminology, I try to keep the language as neutral as possible.
This was written to encourage couples to reach beyond the realm of complacent sexual intimacy. Spicing up the relationship doesn’t mean that couples look outside their relationship, instead choosing to deepen their love and expressiveness and transforming from the realm of simply receiving. Giving IS receiving and this activity is one that I have enjoyed with my wife.
What is it about creampie eating that makes some males so excited? Is it the thought that this is truly eating the forbidden fruit: or is it the strong desire to please our ladies? Either way, some men want to eat creampie prior to cumming but most shy away after. This article is about the joy women receive from creampie licking and how to teach your man to get over the creampie blues. Most couples report that their relationship and love making rocket to the next level once the creampie blues are understood and overcome.
The vast majority (99.9%) of men, an orgasm is immediately followed by, for lack of a better term, the Post-Orgasm Blues (POB). POB is a very legitimate feeling. It is the feeling you get after orgasm that just makes you want to curl up in a ball and go to sleep, turn the game back on or do anything except think about sex. You cum and immediately you lose interest in sex for a little while. There’s no escaping it. POB is a physiological response caused by cascading hormones in your brain. You have little to no control over (without training and encouragement).
The orgasmic cycle and POB physiological response is described (source):
An orgasm (sexual climax) is the conclusion of the plateau phase of the sexual response cycle and may be experienced by both males and females. Orgasm is characterized by intense physical pleasure, controlled by the involuntary, or autonomic, nervous system. It is accompanied by quick cycles of muscle contraction in the lower pelvic muscles, which surround the primary sexual organs and the anus. Orgasms are often associated with other involuntary actions, including muscular spasms in other areas of the body, a general euphoric sensation, and frequently, vocalizations.
Post orgasm is often experienced as relaxing, which is attributed to the release of prolactin. Male and female brains demonstrate similar changes during orgasm, with brain scans showing a temporary reduction in the activity of large parts of the cerebral cortex. Sexual drive is greatly reduced after orgasm.
Prolactin (PRL) or Luteotropic hormone (LTH) is a peptide hormone primarily associated with lactation. In breastfeeding, the act of an infant suckling the nipple stimulates the production of prolactin, which fills the breast with milk via a process called lactogenesis, in preparation for the next feed. Oxytocin, another hormone, is also released, which triggers milk let-down.
In the heat of passion he think he wants to clean out your vagina, but it’s easier said than done because POB can be pretty powerful. Biology trumps desire almost every time.
And let’s forget about the homophobic angle here while we’re on the subject of creampies, shall we? Since when is cunnilingus a homosexual activity (well, unless you’re a lesbian–but that’s another post). I’m not saying that creampies aren’t out there on the fringe – but there’s certainly nothing homosexual about them. Eating a creampie might make him kinky, submissive, or even a little humiliated but it doesn’t make him gay. It makes him a better lover.
So…is it possible to train your man to defeat POB and eat creampie? That’s a good question. You and your partner will be happy to hear the answer is a definite YES. The effects of POB can be overcome. Your brain can be taught to do anything it naturally says “no” to. It takes practice, encouragement, understanding and the most important thing, desire. Not all men have the desire, but if you are with a man who has a desire to eat creampie then you owe it to yourself and him to overcome the POB’s because your sex life and that of your partner will be greatly improved. Consider yourselves one of the lucky ones. Creampie eating is one of the closest, trusting experiences any couple can do. Once he overcome the blues you will want to make it part of your lovemaking routine. Most women say they wished there men had confided in them years ago.
Here are a few proven ways for beating the post-orgasm blues. Most females take to these suggestions quickly and normally report that they take an active role in being the initiators in sex. A female’s sex drive is much higher than that of a male so your frequency will increase dramatically. After all, practice makes perfect. Also, most women report enjoying the feeling of control they are have over their partners. Because of this, creampie-eating will become a constant part of your sexual repertoire.
Just do it. This sounds simple, but caving in to POB really is largely mental. If someone rang a fire alarm right after he came, he could muster the energy to get out alive and maybe even spare some energy to put on clothes. He is not in coma, so snap him out of it and have him clean you. You know he has a strong desire and now it’s your turn to cum.
Consider creampie eating part of lovemaking, the middle part. Part of the problem for him is an orgasm is a nice stopping place, like a period to a sentence. If you considered it a comma, you would just go on. If he is able to make you cum first, you always had to keep your sexual drive high enough to let him do his deed. Now is the time to change that. When he cums, its your turn, have him slide down as if you are ready for the next phase in a continuous lovemaking medley and you are not done yet.With this attitude, you can keep going all night. Ladies – here is where you can truly take an active part in coaching your man. Men who have a cum-play desire to eat creampie, already love cunnilingus. Take charge and have him lick your vulva. Get hot and get wet but do not let your orgasm come. Have the discipline to stop him and tell him to enter you and thrust inside of you hard and deep. After he releases insist that it is your turn and push him south. Not only do you get to enjoy and orgasm (or two), but you will be squeaky clean.
Change up the times of that you make love. If you always have intimacy at night, he (and you) will already be tired before you begin. The POB just adds to his exhaustion and he drop happily into sleep. Why not try a “nooner” or a “wake-me-up?” His energy level will still be high and he will have a better chance of defeating the dreaded POB.
Why not take a rest? Who says that ten seconds after his last ejaculation spurt that he needs to be heading south? Spend a minute, two minutes, ten or fifteen — whatever it takes! — then slide down. OK, so you will have drained a little but that’s perfectly fine. Collect any leakage and place it on your clitoris. You don’t want to make a mess and you sure don’t want him to miss any of his treat. This also allows for more excitement for you. Make him lick your fingers clean while he is taking a rest. I also suggest that you shave. It makes cleaning up your vulva easier and (most) men love the “clean” look. Besides, trying to lick clean matted pubic hair is almost impossible.Talk it over with him. This desire has been around for years. He has confided with you a very personal wish. Let him know your feelings and you love the idea of him licking you clean. That alone can resolve emotional issues such as embarrassment that masquerade as POB. Tease him by telling him “your going to lick me clean tonight”. This will keep both of your sexual excitement high. Take him by the hand and say, “time for your creampie” and lead him off to the bedroom when he least expects it. No more just watching TV all night. Also give him encouragement, which can be helpful. Tell him you’re going to sit on his face afterward. When he is down there licking you clean, talk to him:
“That’s it honey, lick me clean!”
“Isn’t this what you wanted?”
“It feels great!”
Give it a practice run. Have him thrust inside you for a little while and then lick you a little. Thrust some more, lick some more. Keep it up, and after he cums, it is just another part of the cycle.
Ladies – treat this like basketball tryouts; that something this good is worth fighting for! Make him earn a position on the bench. Be his coach. Coaching is about verbal instructions, lots of reinforced behavior change, being tough, caring, aiming for perfection and practice, practice, practice. If you feel semen running down the side of your ass, tell him that he is missing some and make sure he licks it up. I suggest in the early stages of overcoming his POB, make him clean you out as often as you can. .
Ladies treat your man’s desire as a gift. You have an opportunity to take control in your sexual activities. There are women in this world who have never experienced an orgasm. You are blessed with a man who has a unique desire that needs to be embraced and developed. Having a man lick your vulva is one thing, but teaching him to love eating creampie, gives you a very special position of authority in love making. Generally, you are in control. You are the last one to cum and you no longer leak all over the place. Enjoy your new found role in love-making. Good luck and don’t take “no” for an answer. In no time flat your lover will be enjoying himself and, rest assured that you both will be.
Have you ever had one of those conversations with your spouse, partner or lover about what the depth of your love could enable you to achieve? Have you given thought to what sorts of feats you would accomplish to demonstrate the love you have for the other? Have you considered what barriers or obstacles that you could blow through in order to span a measure of the distance to demonstrate to him or her what extent you are willing to travel for them?
Obviously, with a blog title of The Essence of Love-Making and the subject matter that lies within, there is one very erotic action that would be raised as one of the questions that I referred to in the previous paragraph (more on this particular question later). What are the barriers that preclude us from demonstrating absolute comfort with our partner? I suppose that I could make this more specific…does your love compel you to do things that you would ordinarily view as being “gross?”
I find myself increasingly laying down what was once uncomfortable (or, gross, if that term works better for you) in favor of wanting to not let my own inhibitions stand in the way of my affection. Let me list a few of examples below along with how I now (or desire) to respond.
Deep, passionate kisses first thing in the morning (forsaking morning breath). If we both have morning breath, why does it matter? Kiss away! Kiss freely!!
Full contact, bodies pressed together, hugs when she is sweaty from a workout. Unless I am wearing a suit and preparing to head out for some other special occasion, I will hug her. If she is finishing an athletic event (running race, triathlon, etc.), you had better believe that I am going to hug her in celebration! The question is, does (or will) she hug me?
Making love after a full day (i.e., not showering before intimacy). I know that some couples (especially depending upon what sort of work either does) will absolutely avoid physical contact until after their bodies are clean. Unless I have been out camping for three days, I have no problem with getting our bodies together for passionate sex without a shower. If we both are days without a shower, it truly doesn’t matter.
Oral sex without an immediately prior shower. (see #3). I do enjoy her fragrance and I have no issues with being “down there,” especially if the intimacy is spontaneous and uncontrollable. My natural inclination is to head south no matter what and give her all the pleasure that she desires and can handle.
Kissing after oral sex. For me, this is an absolute no hesitation move. If she goes down on me and takes me to completion, not only would I not resist her kiss, but I need her to kiss me! The same is true for the roles to be reversed. After I pleasure her, I am going to kiss her deeply. Our love fluids are no longer a roadblock for me – instead, they are an on-ramp to the next intimacy freeway!
Wake-up sex following a previous evening of sex. This isn’t a consideration for me. Of course I am ready for sex first thing in the morning. I do like the messy nature of it all and to be with her through all of that is heavenly!
Wake-up oral sex. By now, these situations seem silly. Why would I not go down? I want to wake her up with oral!!
Oral sex following penetrative (i.e. intercourse). Again, this is ridiculous considering the nature of my blog and what I absolutely enjoy doing. It went from a goal to something that is a facet of making love. A means to take intimacy to new levels.
Wake-up oral sex after a prior evening of sex. This is something that I have never tried nor experienced. The idea is sexy yet there needs to be a measure of intimate trust that will allow for me to do this. Does she trust me with her body? Would she let herself be vulnerable to my oral desires? I want to experiment with this one day.
There are other, less sensual expressions that rise to the top of my consciousness such as: sharing food from the same utensil. How about the ultimate in food sharing…biting from the same apple (a la Adam and Eve)? What comes to your mind? What do you see yourself doing or wanting your other half to do?